Forced Homeschooling

In the midst of this worldwide crisis, I feel almost guilty in knowing that my wife and I have it pretty good. Living in Vietnam, our country only has about 200 cases of COVID-19 and most of those have already recovered. There has not been a single death. AND this is a country that borders China. This is not by chance. Vietnam has been on top of this thing from the beginning and is not taking any chances.

And while everything is shut down and people have to stay home, we already worked from home. AND we just happen to be in online education. The whole world is now doing school at home and that is exactly what we do for a living. Our income actually went up when the world started falling apart.

Despite the fact that this is what we do for a living, I see a lot of stress being caused by this new life that has been suddenly thrust upon everyone. Forced homeschooling is not working for many many families.

For those of you who are nailing it, good for you. And I mean that. It's great, but for most people, it is not working. And there is a variety of reasons for that. First off, believe it or not, the majority of adults are not teachers and never wanted to be. Raising your kids to be a self-sufficient, responsible adult is not the same as trying to help him understand the symbolism of Henry's journey in the Red Badge of Courage.

Unless you are a teacher or work in a specific field, much of the stuff you were taught in school you haven't seen in decades. Not many parents remember how to do these things:

• Diagram a sentence
• Know the precise meaning of the grammar terms - present perfect tense, past progressive tense, gerunds, participles, helping verbs, phrasal verbs, indirect/direct object, etc.
• Solve math problems using the Quadratic Equation or Pythagorian Theorem.
• Understand the implications of the U.S. involvement in the War of 1812
• Outline a term paper
• So many other things that were forgotten after you left school

And that doesn't even take into consideration the fact that not all households have a parent at home to do this work with their kids. Many people are still considered to be "essential" workers and have to go to work. Or they might be at home but have their own work to do. Work-at-home is not vacation time. It means there is work to do. A large percentage of the population is having a very difficult time finding the time (and patience) to get their kids' schoolwork done.

Let's also not forget the number of households who do not have adequate internet. Or only have one computer when there are three kids who "need" it or dad needs it to do his job. What about the households that just don't have a conducive atmosphere for learning?

• Older kids having to babysit younger kids
• Abusive, neglectful or alcoholic parents
• Noisy environments
• Little space
• Illness in the home
• Chaotic atmosphere

All of these things make it very difficult for the schoolwork to actually happen. And, even if it is being completed, the strained environment means that nothing is actually being learned for many students. Plus, this insistence on completing the school year is putting the population at risk of further infection.

I have seen multiple Facebook posts by people noticing school-aged children sitting in corners at Wal-Mart with laptops to take advantage of their free Wi-Fi so they can get their homework assignments. The same is happening in McDonald's parking lots and many other places. In South Carolina, some districts have parked buses in rural areas that transmit a Wi-Fi signal to help those students who may not have internet at home. These buses are meant to help, but…

At the same time, people are being told to stay home and there is a reason for that. No child (or anyone) should have to leave their home and put people's lives on the line just to complete homework.

Many suggest that kids who do not have internet should contact their teachers so they can have packets sent to their house.

Once again, not safe. Cardboard and paper have been proven to be able to hold onto the virus for days. Exchanging packets back and forth is just another way of potentially spreading the virus.

Is all of this stuff worth the risk just so little Johnny doesn't fall behind?

I have news for everyone.

Your child is not falling behind when the rest of the entire world is in the same situation!

If they don't get their work done, it will not be a disaster when they go back to school because there will be tons of other kids who didn't get it done either. Or kids who got it done, but didn't actually learn the material. Or kids who have so many questions or holes in their learning.

Plus, I know teachers from several different states and the expectations are different everywhere:

• Some schools aren't even keeping track of grades right now
• Some schools are requiring teachers to still report to school during school hours (unsafe and irresponsible practice)
• Some schools have dismissed classes until next year 
• There is no national or even state-wide standard for any of this. Each school is scrambling to make it work.
• Teachers are doing an awesome job tackling a situation they were not prepared for, but there is no consistency in learning because every home is different.

I have a friend who works all day. Her older children (still children themselves) have to try to school the younger children during the day and can't even begin their own schoolwork until Mom gets home to take care of the younger kids.  Their life is just babysitting and schoolwork on top of all this other stress. There are lots of tears in that house all day.

The world is very scary right now and incredibly stressful. For the children also. They may not really understand what is happening depending on their age, but they know things are not right. Adding to that stress by insisting that all this extra stuff has to be done as well just makes things worse. Plus, it's not going to really matter when they all go back to school anyway. The teachers will be scrambling to even things out once again and try to fix this.

I am not suggesting that children should not be engaging in academic activities. I am only saying that school is not and should not be a priority right now. If it gets to be too much, let it go or cut it back. We're going to be locked in our houses for much longer than most people (including our leaders) want to admit. It is very important that our homes be as happy and stress-free as possible.

Love your kids during this time and make them feel safe. If when this is over they haven't learned how to recognize adverb clauses when used as adjunct adverbials, is it really going to matter?

PSA: Stop Being Stupid! - (Take 2)

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote an angry rant about the idiot lemmings on Facebook who just copy and paste everything they are told to. Click here for that rant.

That was about people posting that their timeline was missing people and this Facebook post could fix it.

Do you remember these posts floating around?

Well, now that I have educated the world about just how stupid that is everyone should know better, but apparently they don't.

Today, Facebook is flooded with these posts.

Now, before I get going, I want it known that I do not have a problem with any of the people who made these posts. They were told by one of their friends that they had received a bogus friend request and just chose to warn people that it was not them. They didn't know what was going on and just chose to share a warning. They got the same message the rest of us did and fell for it, but at least they didn't forward it on.

However, I DO have a problem with the people who sent out the private message to their friends that caused this panic.

I have received this message from 17 different people today.

SEVENTEEN!!!

And that is just so far. One of those came in while I was typing this post. It's not over yet.

Let's break this down a bit.

When I received the very first one this morning (before I knew this was going to be a big thing), I knew it wasn't true.

Now, I am not making this claim to say "Oh, look how smart I am." I am saying it because the message makes no sense.

The first line states that the sender received a friend request from me. So, at first, I thought they had. After all, that's what they claimed. However, as I continued to read the message, it was very obviously a message that they received and were told to forward. So, they did.

Now, it's bad enough that someone just forwards anything they are told to forward, but when I called the first person out on sending this thing, he responded in the same way as four other people responded later in the day.

ROUGH PARAPHRASE: I really don't know anything about computers, so…

Now, I'm sorry…but no.  You're not off the hook.

You may have told me you don't know anything about computers, but you are familiar with the English language. The message that these people sent to me and many of their friends includes the language "I actually got another friend request from you". This is not complicated computer lingo or industry technical jargon.

You may not know anything about computers or the internet or Facebook, but you DO know that you did NOT receive a friend request from me and you are sending me a message that states you did. That has nothing to do with your knowledge about computers. That has to do with your grasp of the English language. And I know you understand English because you followed all the directions included on how to copy and paste. However, you paid no attention to the content of what you were sending.

I said this in my last post about Facebook lunacy and I will say it again. Sending someone a message that contains content you know not to be true makes you a liar. Strong language, I know. But that is the definition of the word.

You did not receive a friend request from me, yet you sent me a message that claims you did. Why? Because someone told you to send it.

Let's put this in a real-world setting and try to imagine what the average person would do.

---

Let's say one of your co-workers walks up to you and says, "Hey, I have received three party invitations from you. I know they are not from you, but I thought you should know. Someone is throwing a party in your name. You need to let everyone else know so they don't fall for it."

You are shocked as to why someone would want to host a party and say it was your party. "OK. I'll let people know they should not accept invitations for my party since I am not throwing one."

Your co-worker says, "Wait. No. Don't tell people the invites from you are fake. Go tell someone you received an invitation from them and you know it was fake."

Now you are confused, "But I didn't get an invitation from them. You said you got one from me. When did you get it?"

The co-worker sighs. "Ugh. I didn't. Someone told me they received a fake one from me, so I'm trying to spread the word."

You cock your head, "So, why am I telling people invites came from me when they came from you?"

"Oh my goodness. Listen, they didn't actually come from me. They were fake. But Brenda told me that Charles had told her he had received some from her…for her party…that she is not actually having. Anyway, you better hurry. And be sure to tell everyone in the office individually to ignore any party requests from you. Also, they need to let everyone know to ignore any requests that are sent from them. Understand?"

"You are crazy."

---

That conversation seems more realistic. Why does logic and critical thinking just fly out the window as soon some people read it on Facebook?

 

PSA: Stop Being Stupid!

Today is my birthday.

Forty-seven years old.

And as someone reaching the justified "grumpy old man" status, I was met with something that made me grumpy as soon as I rolled out of bed and checked my Facebook. Although, honestly, this seems to happen more and more often lately.

It was one of these stupid Facebook posts. Maybe you've seen this one floating around.

I cropped out the owner of this account to save a little embarrassment

Here it is in text form in case you can't see the picture well.

I wondered where everybody had been!
This is good to know: It's ridiculous to have 200 friends and only 25 are allowed to see my post.
I ignored this post earlier, but It WORKS!! I have a whole new news feed. I’m seeing posts from people I haven’t seen in years.
Here’s how to bypass the system FB now has in place that limits posts on your news feed.
Their new algorithm chooses the same few people - about 25 - who will read your posts. Therefore,
Hold your finger down anywhere in this post and "copy" will pop up. Click "copy". Then go your page, start a new post and put your finger anywhere in the blank field. "Paste" will pop up and click paste.
This will bypass the system.
If you are reading this message, do me a favor and leave me a quick comment...a "hello," a sticker, whatever you want, so you will appear in my newsfeed! It WORKS!!

Please bring back my friend

I have been seeing this all over Facebook for the last weeks. I hadn't seen it for a few days, but it was back again this morning and now I have high cholesterol. It's time to speak up. Let's stop being stupid!

Before I get started here, if you are one of the people who has shared this status, let me take the time to personally apolog…nope. Nope. Nope. I can't do it. You should have known better. And this isn't about computer savvy. Pay attention.

Let me try to help some of you out there and maybe we can stop this lunacy.

Basically, this post states that the algorithm Facebook uses keeps you from seeing all the posts of your friends (or your friends from seeing you - there's a bit of discrepancy in the language used here).  There is some truth to this statement. Facebook does mess with your timeline a little. I understand that can be frustrating and wanting to fix it. This post claims to be the way to do so.

It is the people who actually believe the claims of this post who baffle me. Once again, no apology. Get a helmet.

Let's break this down a few sentences at a time.

I wondered where everybody had been!
This is good to know: It's ridiculous to have 200 friends and only 25 are allowed to see my post.
I ignored this post earlier, but It WORKS!! I have a whole new news feed. I’m seeing posts from people I haven’t seen in years.

The first thing that caught my attention was this claim that it works.

How do you know that it works? If you are just posting this on your page for the first time, you cannot honestly claim that it works. You have not seen the results yet. In fact, while you are pasting it in, you haven't even hit SEND yet and you are still telling all of your friends that this works when you actually have no idea or even the thinnest shred of evidence. That makes you a liar.

That may seem like harsh language, but it is what it is. Liar. How does it feel to have your britches constantly on fire?

I wondered where everybody had been!
This is good to know: It's ridiculous to have 200 friends and only 25 are allowed to see my post.
I ignored this post earlier, but It WORKS!! I have a whole new news feed. I’m seeing posts from people I haven’t seen in years.

For this section, let's look at the discrepancy in what this thing actually claims to do. The first bold statement claims that some people aren't able to see your post. However, the second bold statement uses language stating that you are not seeing other people's posts. Which is it? Is the problem with how you see your own wall restricting you from seeing other people or with how your posts go out to others and keeps them from seeing yours?

And if you think I'm being picky here, the writer mixes them up again a little further down.

Here’s how to bypass the system FB now has in place that limits posts on your news feed.
Their new algorithm chooses the same few people - about 25 - who will read your posts. Therefore,

Once again, does this algorithm limit what you see or limit what posts of yours your friends can see. These are not the same thing. Even if this thing did work (SPOILER ALERT: it doesn't), it would not fix both your's and your friends' walls.  The original author of this post couldn't even decide which lie he wanted to tell. But for some reason, many of you are willing to help him anyway.

Now, let's look at the most incredible part of this entire thing.

Hold your finger down anywhere in this post and "copy" will pop up. Click "copy". Then go your page, start a new post and put your finger anywhere in the blank field. "Paste" will pop up and click paste.
This will bypass the system.

The instructions direct you to copy this status and then paste it into your feed. And like a good sheep, many people did just as they were told. That is what is supposed to fix it. Let's look at this claim.

By the time you have done this and hit SEND, all you have really done is put up a Facebook status. Something you have done hundreds of times. You did not change any settings. You did not reset your account. You did not bypass the system (what system?). You did not rewrite any algorithm. You have done nothing but post a status. How, in the name of Sofía Vergara, could anyone possibly have believed that posting something on their wall would change their account settings.

Probably the same people who think sharing or liking a status will save a random baby who has cancer. 

I pointed this idiocy out to someone the other day and they told me I was wrong. He said I missed a key part of the message, but I said that I only missed that he was one of the idiots. He pointed out that the message asked the people who see it to leave a comment to get them added to the new list of people who will get to see their stuff (or you'll get to see their stuff - still some confusion there) in order for it to work.

Here is what he was talking about.

If you are reading this message, do me a favor and leave me a quick comment...a "hello," a sticker, whatever you want, so you will appear in my newsfeed! It WORKS!!

This is the same as the problem I pointed out above. How does someone leaving a comment approve them to be part of your feed in any different way than if they were leaving a comment before? In the end, you are still just posting a status and they are leaving a comment.

NOTHING DIFFERENT  OR SPECIAL  OR MAGICAL
HAS HAPPENED HERE!

…other than you are getting laughed at by the person who originally wrote this post to see how many people would fall for it.

STOP IT!

The only way to see certain people in your newsfeed more often is to be sure your settings are arranged the way you want them and interact with people on Facebook. Facebook does give precedence to the people you interact with more. But a one-time status, comment or like will have ZERO effect.

The people who believe and post this stuff are probably the same people who post the status claiming that Facebook has no legal right to the pictures they uploaded there. Despite the fact that using Facebook required agreeing to Zuckerberg's TERMS AND CONDITIONS (an actual legal document).

So, everyone, for the sake my happiness, don't be stupid. AND if you see someone else being stupid, please say something. They need to know…and be publicly shamed if you can arrange it.

F - Firewall

I love the internet. LOVE IT! All those statistics about how much time people spend on their computers every day that sound so depressing can be tripled when applied to me. I read blogs, check the news, post on social media, watch YouTube videos, download movies, do my banking and tons of other stuff.

When I lived in the States, I used it for most of my shopping, booking tickets to anywhere, finding coupons, ordering food, etc. I love love love the internet and fully believe in using it to its full potential.

However, my usage of it has changed drastically in the last couple of years.

Now, I live in China and the internet is a totally different animal over here. It is highly restricted. Whereas using the internet in the States is like a massive orgy in the mud at a rock concert, the internet in China is like doing it with a comatose patient and you're triple wrapped with condoms.

The Chinese government is very proud of what they call the 'Golden Firewall.' The people of China cannot access any non-Chinese social media. Here are just a few of the banned sites:

• Facebook
• Twitter
• Pinterest
• tumblr
• Instagram

They also don't allow most non-Chinese news sites:

• Fox News
• CNN
• TIME
• Al Jazeera
• Huffington Post 

They don't allow anything Google:

• google.com
• Google maps
• Blogger
• YouTube
• Gmail

And no streaming video sites:

• Netflix
• Hulu
• Amazon Prime
• HBO Go

All of these services have their own Chinese version. However, they are all heavily monitored. Saying the wrong thing can get you in a lot of trouble. Don't ever say anything against the government or the Communist Party and as certain events happen they often add to the list of even specific words you cannot use. Here's a link to an article of new restrictions from the last month.

Click the picture to read the article

To even be able to access sites like this (or even my blog) a person in China needs to use a VPN which basically fools the internet provider into thinking you are accessing the internet from a server in another country. It's not legal, but it's the only way to get news from outside China. New laws are passed all the time to penalize people who are caught using them and people who provide them.

For those of you who are reading this and screaming at their screen "YOU IDIOT. YOU ARE POSTING RIGHT NOW ABOUT HOW YOU ARE BREAKING THE LAW!!!" You can relax.

I am not breaking the law. I am writing this up in a Microsoft Word document and emailing it to my brother for him to upload to Blogspot since I do not have access to it.

I really miss Netflix.

Maybe Society Should Have a Warning Label

Every now and then, something happens in America and I get to hold my smug head high and say "Not me, I don't live there." I may be from the States, but I've been safely on the other side of the world in China for the last 18 months. Therefore, I will accept no responsibility for the events that have prompted some of the recent headlines.

Tide Pod Challenge 

First, let's not even get into how stupid someone has to be to think that eating soap would be a good idea. For generations, parents washed kids' mouths out with soap as a punishment. Now, the kids are doing it willingly. There are plenty of jokes already written about this and a ton of memes. You've already seen everything floating around social media and can look them up for yourself if you wish.

Stop discouraging people from eating Tide Pods. It won't work. The whole reason the world's in the mess it's in goes back to the very first people being told NOT to eat something.

— Minor Character (@brettminor) January 23, 2018

People (especially young people whose brains haven't fully developed yet) doing stupid things is not really surprising. Still stupid. Feel free to shame them all you like (I know I do). But not surprising. A huge percentage of the world's population are idiots and always will be. What surprises me is the reactions that people have to the stupid trends.

Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, Pinterest, Google and other sites started getting pressure to remove all videos featuring idiots eating Tide Pods. Some sites even started giving 'strikes' to people who uploaded content showing people eating Tide Pods. Some people have even suggested holding these companies liable for even having the videos. Click here for an article explaining it all.

Tide even hastily threw together a video to stop people from ingesting their non-food product.

What should Tide PODs be used for? DOING LAUNDRY. Nothing else.

Eating a Tide POD is a BAD IDEA, and we asked our friend @robgronkowski to help explain. pic.twitter.com/0JnFdhnsWZ

— Tide (@tide) January 12, 2018

I find it pathetic that pressure was put on them to have to say anything at all to the idiots who are well aware of what they are doing, but I respect the attitude that Tide took with their public service announcement.

They have been active in getting information out there about not eating laundry detergent and have helped to get internet videos removed, but they have stated that they will not change the appearance of their product. To read the article, click here. To summarize their stance: Stupid people are stupid people and we cannot change that. You're lucky we are even acknowledging these idiots. There's already a warning label on the box. That should be enough.

And I couldn't agree more.

It bothers me that pressure is being put on anyone to do something about this. No one is to blame for any idiot older than a toddler purposefully chewing on a Tide Pod. Not a website, not the manufacturer, not another person who did it, no one other than the person who made this choice. That person is a moron and YouTube cannot be blamed for that.

YouYube also has videos showing how to grow a garden, fix your car, ace an interview, etc. If you just have to do something you saw on the internet, have an honor student help you choose a better video.

---

Next topic, Crock-Pot Mania

SPOILER ALERT: If you are a watcher of the hit TV show This is Us and are not familiar with the big plot-twist that happened earlier this week, do not continue. You have been warned.

Now, I do not watch This is Us. I am not really even sure what it is about, but it is in the news this week because they killed off one of the main characters. Jack Pearson, the "world's greatest dad" dies in a house fire that was started by a crock pot.

Now, other than entertainment news, this doesn't seem like much of a news story. However, it has grown into something more. This sometimes happens when people are stupid. If you haven't noticed, this is the theme I am running with.

People all over the country are looking at their crock pots with suspicion and wondering if they are safe to have in their homes. It has gotten so bad that both the writers of the show and crock pot companies have had to issue statements explaining the safety of these devices.

Apparently, many of the fans of this show don't realize that this crockpot was a fictional item that was 20 years old and had a faulty switch that "had to be fiddled with a little" to get it to work. Emphasis on the word fictional. This was a literary device used to produce the outcome the writers were going for. They could have used an electric knife, a dishwasher, just faulty wiring, or had him stumble down the stairs and break his neck. That's it. But…as with the Tide Pod Challenge, people are stupid. Now, they're scared of their slow cookers. I don't even know what to say.

Maybe we could learn a lesson from Mexico where even their drug lords are more trustworthy.

Good. Nothing to worry about. If there's anything I know about international drug lords, it's that they're impeccably honest. pic.twitter.com/ZyvbgHN3Xa

— Minor Character (@brettminor) January 26, 2018

Defending My Choice to Give to Charity

A couple of weeks ago, I was nominated to do the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. Now, I am sure that most of you are familiar with what this is, but for the few of you who may not be, I'll try to explain.

Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS), often referred to as "Lou Gehrig's Disease," is a progressive neurodegenerative disease that affects nerve cells in the brain and the spinal cord. It basically causes the muscles of the body to stop receiving nourishment.

Sometime within the last couple of years, someone came up with a genius idea and the Ice Bucket Challenge was born. It involves a person dumping a bucket of ice water over their head and then challenging someone else (usually three others) to do the same. This is usually captured on video and posted on the internet for everyone to see.

A person who has been challenged is to donate $100 to the ALS Association (www.alsa.org). However, many people do not have an extra $100 laying around, so they have another option. If they dump ice water on their head and post a video of it on the internet, they can give a smaller amount of their choosing. They are also to nominate three more people for the challenge. This is all supposed to happen within 24 hours.

Whether the people nominated donate the full amount or a smaller amount, the cycle lives on as long as the nominees continue to keep nominating more people. As of the time of this posting, the ALS Association website states that the Ice Bucket Challenge has raised over $114 million dollars for the cause.

After being nominated myself, I sprang to action that same afternoon. Here is my video.

I wanted to do something different from the thousands of other videos that have been uploaded to YouTube and have a little bit of fun. It took some courage for me to remove my shirt in front of a camera, but I was happy with my video and glad I did it…for a few days.

Before long, I started noticing posts on Facebook and Twitter that seemed to condemn the practice of participating in this challenge. Anti-Ice Bucket memes started popping up all over my feed.

People were posting about how they had been challenged, but chose to just donate in private and not make a public spectacle out of their generosity like all the attention whores. 

Others ridiculed the people who participated in order to get out of having to give. This one had a little bit of a point since there were a large number of people who had completely misunderstood how this was supposed to work. People willing to dump the ice were not supposed to do this to get out of donating. It was to be able to give a smaller amount and pass the challenge on to others to raise even more money.

Now, these posts may have already been there before I participated and I was only now noticing because I had recently done it. Also, none of this was directed specifically toward me. Since I was seeing it on Facebook, that means it was coming from my friends. People who I love and I know love me, so I did not take any of this personally, but it did bother me a bit. Suggesting that me participating in fundraising for a worthy charity was bad or self-serving in some way just didn't sit well with me.

First of all, suggesting that the people who participated in this challenge are a bunch of greedy attention whores* is completely unfair. It is true that I only donated to ALS because I was nominated for the challenge. Sure, I could have donated without participating or even without having been nominated, but there are literally thousands of causes out there. No one knows which causes or how many causes I may already be contributing to. They also don't know how much or for how long I have been giving. The fact that I put a video of my dumping ice water on my head does not prove that I only give when it is a game. A person's generosity (or lack of) is in no way indicated by whether or not they chose to participate in this phenomenon.

^*The attention whore part I will concede to. I am and always have been an attention whore.

In fact, there are literally thousands of very generous people out there who have not contributed to this cause. They have been giving to other causes that they are passionate about. It may be to feed starving children, prevent animal cruelty, raise domestic abuse awareness, clean up a city park, elect a political official, protect the mosquitoes, bring back bell-bottom jeans, or an infinite number of other possible causes. Once again, whether or not a person participated in the Ice Bucket Challenge will tell the observers absolutely nothing about the generosity of that person.

That's a lot of zeros

I will even take this a little further. Participating in the challenge and participating publicly contributes more money to the cause than giving privately. If I privately contribute $100 to ALS, then ALS has $100 they didn't have before and that is a good thing. However, it stops right there. On the other hand, if I give $50 and then challenge three others to do the same, the $50 each of them contributes (plus my $50) adds up to a total of $200 instead of just the original $100. This doesn't even add in the money that will get contributed by the people that they challenge and then the people that they challenge. Even if people only contribute $10 instead of $50, it is still vastly more than the original $100. However the numbers deviate, it cannot be denied that in whatever way people participated or contributed or even completely misunderstood the point of how this is supposed to work, $114 million dollars has been raised with this challenge.

$114,000,000
That's a lot of zeros.

If we had relied on the adage of people should just give more, then this money would not have been raised. I salute the person or team who came up with this idea and I am sure it will not be the last time that people are looked down upon for doing something good.

Someone to Love

Due to my recent class schedule (and new job that actually expects me to do stuff), I have been busy enough that my blogging has slowed down significantly. Plus, I have been spending a substantial amount of time with Red of Doesn't Speak Klingon.

For my regular readers, you already know that we met through our blogs. We regularly commented on each others' posts and it just grew from there. For those of you that are newer readers, Red and I met through our blogs. We regularly commented on each others' posts and it just grew from there. However, for the people in our real lives (non-bloggers), they were not present to see this blogging love drama play out.

Every time one of us meet a member of the other person's family or group of friends, we are asked, "How did you meet?"

It's a legitimate question since there was a 900 mile distance between us when this first started. Even today, we have been actual face-to-face dating for over a year, but have to travel 200 miles to see each other. People tend to wonder how we got together. Plus, people are nosy.

When asked the question, we always smile and say "We met online."

Nosy interrogator: "OH! A dating site?"

Us: (at the same time, emphatically, and loudly): "NO!"

I don't know why we have always been so adamant about making sure people understand we did not meet on a dating site. In fact, we each very quickly try to make it clear that neither of us has ever had a dating profile. It just seems to reek of a desperation we don't want to be associated with.

However, I do understand the immediate assumption. I've heard that 1 out of 4 new relationships are started online and most of those are the result of dating sites. Personally, I know a few dozen people who are dating someone they met through a dating site and even know of a few marriages.

All this came to mind last night when I saw a commercial on television for a dating site called Farmers Only. It is an online dating site for country people. Their motto is "Because city folks just don't get it."

Seriously? Do we really need a dating site that specifically caters to ranchers and farmers? Now, I am not being critical of these people. I grew up in the country and proudly identified myself as a redneck.

Not a hick…a redneck. There is a difference.

As ridiculous as this seems, the more I thought about it, the more it made sense to me. Since most dating profiles consist of a picture and a short description, you could easily waste a lot of your time scouring profiles of people who are radically different than you. Not that country people and city people couldn't ever make it work, but commonalities are usually more compatible than differences. Finding someone who has the same mindset as you would give a much better success rate. Why not narrow the field a bit? If you were a cattle rancher, your future spouse would have to be someone who was happy living the life of a cattle rancher's wife.

It just made me wonder, if this service was being marketed to the niche market of farmers, what other people groups might benefits from a personality specific type of service?

I turned to the internet and soon found a site for people who had grown disenfranchised from the mainstream dating sites. Try to imagine this scenario. You are looking for love and have had no luck in the real world, so you start an online dating profile. As I mentioned before, most profiles consist of a short bio and a picture. Unfortunately, you are not what most people would consider attractive.

When a picture of your ugly mug is on a dating site with hundreds of other people's more attractive pictures, it quickly becomes depressing when no one wants to contact you and no one returns your invitations to talk. What are you supposed to do?

Luckily, there is a site just for you and the other Uggos. The Ugly Bug Ball is a dating site for the aesthetically average. It sounds really depressing.

Another site that does something similar, but in a more positive way is The Big & the Beautiful. This site is all about being comfortable with who you are. It is for bigger girls and the men who love them. The site actually used the term chubby chasers.

On the other end of the spectrum is Beautiful People. If you are one of the beautiful people of the world and feel that you deserve an equally attractive mate and shouldn't be lumped in with all the "less than spectacular" people, then this is the site for you. However, you had better be sure you actually are a beautiful person or you may be hit with a dose of reality. You can't just join the site. The uggos are not allowed. You must submit pictures which will be put on the site to be judged by the current members. IF you are deemed attractive enough, they will let you in.

From there, the sites just got more specific. Whether you are attractive or not, if you are a nerd, Nerd Passions is there to help you find your future nerdy spouse. You can even specify what is is that makes you a nerd. Do you want someone to play video games with? Are you looking for a date to Comic-Con? Do you want someone to accompany you to Magic the Gathering nerdfests? It would be better to pick up a girl from this site so there would be no surprises when she finds out you will spend more time with Lara Croft than you ever will with her. If you happen to be an African American, but are concerned that white people just don't make the right kind of nerds, there is even a specific site for Black Nerds.

A year ago, I went to a cookout at Red's parents' house. Her dad made some fantastic pork chops. As I dove into this culinary delight, I looked over to discover that Red was eating a large mushroom. What? A mushroom?  I love my meat. I can't think of any animal that I wouldn't eat given the chance. Now, Red is not a vegetarian, but does not share my love of animal flesh. We have worked it out, but believe it or not, there is a dating site that addresses this issue. Veggie Date is a dating site for vegetarians and those who love the vegan lifestyle.

For people who love to read, it is sometimes frustrating to hold a conversation with someone who hasn't picked up a book since high school. Alikewise is specifically for bibliophiles (book lovers) and even pairs people up by the types of books they most enjoy. If you are very, very specific about the books you read and must have someone who agrees, The Atlasphere is for Ayn Rand fans. Specifically, fans of Atlas Shrugged and The Fountainhead. I like Ayn Rand, but WOW!

Seeking Arrangement, Sugar Daddies, and What's Your Price are all sites for women looking to be pampered by a wealthy and generous man. On one of these sites, the women can join for free and only the men pay. In fact, if a man in interested in going out with a woman on the site, they can begin a negotiation with the site as a mediator to agree on a price for a date. Until a price is agreed upon, the communication feature is locked.

There are sites for Christians, Democrats, Mormons, people over 50 years old, people who are looking for a mate covered in tattoos and piercings, people who don't want children, and even people who are Apple or Mac lovers. It seems that someone has set up a dating site for what ever your special interest may be. I found dating sites based on beer, yoga, coffee, fashion, travel, golf, chocolate, and frugals (cheap skates). Some revolved around professions: lawyers, millionaires, psychics, teachers, and ballet dancers.

I even found a site for people who are HIV Positive. This one kind of makes sense. If you have AIDS, another person who already has it would probably be the place to start looking for a match.

I just can't imagine having to have this much in common with another person. I wonder if there is a site out there for self-employed midget psychic ex-con Libertarians who love bird watching and ethnically-based stand-up comedy. Whether there is or not, I firmly believe there's someone out there for everyone.

"I" is for Internet

I live on the internet.

I really do. I do it all on the internet. I have always been pretty computer savvy, but you don't have to be anymore for the things that are available to basically anyone with a decent internet connection. I have heard some people complain that using their computer is too complicated, but I beg to differ. When I can sit down at my computer and take care of things in an hours that before would have taken me a few days, I don't think their argument is valid.

• Shopping
• Banking
• Travel plans
• Reservations
• Order Pizza
• School
• Information on everything
• Television
• Read

Prophetic movie about the future
difficulty of finding Twinkies.

As far back as 2001, I stopped renting movies at the video store because I could get on Netflix and have them shipped straight to me. Plus, it was much cheaper. It also removes the annoyance of walking up and down the aisles of a store trying to find what you want and then praying that it is in. Plus, the service helps me to not miss the movies I really want to see. As soon as I see a trailer for something I want to see, I put it in my queue to be sent to me as soon as it comes out on video.

If for some reason I hear about a movie LONG before it is to come out, it may not be on the Netflix site to schedule it yet. If that is the case, I go to a site called DVD Later and sign up for the movie there. That site (which is free to use) will put the movie in my Netflix queue as soon as it is available. Now with streaming, I can watch the movie immediately. In fact, there is no need to even have cable because everything is online.

No longer is there a need to actually meet with teachers. My daughter goes to a rather large school and I could never get proper time with them anyway. I can now log onto the school's website and see her current grades, teacher's notes for assignments and even scans of some of her work. An email to a teacher is promptly returned as compared to phone calls that often took days or sometimes not at all.

I am getting my Master's Degree right now and do it all from the convenience of my laptop. I interact with the teacher and the other students almost daily. I read, research, and write papers in front of a computer screen.

This may be my favorite of internet conveniences. I pay ALL my bills online. Every single one of them. Even places that don't have online billing, like my local water company. When a bill comes due, I receive an email. I log onto my bank site and tell them to send a check. I haven't had my own checks for years and never even buy stamps anymore. I just don't need to.

All my banking is done online as well. I have a special account that rewards me for never walking in and disturbing a teller. I get kickbacks on every purchase. I get into museums, amusement parks and zoos for free. I get great discounts at hundreds of locations and all I have to do is keep all my banking online. My checks are directly deposited and I pay everything through my computer. Since the bank is saved on manpower, they reward me.

I am also an avid reader. Once I bought a Kindle, I knew I could keep books on it, but soon learned I could even check out books from the library without leaving my house. Sitting at home I visit the library site, download the book, and it works for two weeks before it deletes itself.

Doing research on any topic has gotten easier as well. The misguided people who think using the internet for research is not as effective, apparently don't know how to use it to its potential. The only reason someone would argue that a person needs to go to the library is because it was the way they were taught. I have nothing against books, I love them. However, what is the advantage to searching for hours in a library to find the books you need when I can find that same book online in a matter of seconds. I can have the information of a hundred books at my fingertips within moments while someone else is still searching through the card catalog. Almost any scholarly work has been uploaded to the internet and can be found easily by anyone who knows how to search.

From the comfort of my home, I also order pizza while searching for the best coupons at the same time. I make reservations for restaurants, book airline tickets, make hotel reservations, grocery shop, buy electronics, find people, research companies, apply for jobs, etc, etc, etc. The list goes on and on. I even met my girlfriend online.

A few months ago, I landed a job I could do from my home. It had officially reached the point that I never needed to step outside my house for anything. I could even buy my clothes online and have them shipped to me. Of course, if I wasn't going outside, then I didn't really need clothes. I don't even need to consult a doctor because I have WebMD.

Some may be concerned that this much dependence on technology will cut back on social interaction, but we have Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest for that. If you think you have to actually be face to face with someone, then buy a webcam and Skype with them.

I know that I am addicted to technology. Many addicts will deny their addiction and scream, "I can quit any time I want." I am not making that claim. I love my internet and artificial connection to the world and don't plan to ever give it up.

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Happily participating in the Blogging from A to Z Challenge. For the entire month of April, 1,897 bloggers are still working their way through the alphabet. One letter every day but Sundays for a total of 26 days.

Click here to visit the website and get more information to see if you might want to join in next year. It's a lot of fun, introduces you to hundreds of new blogs and gives your writing some fantastic exposure.

"G" is for Google

Sometimes, I wonder how we survived without the internet. It doesn't matter what I'm doing or what I am thinking of, as soon as I want to know anything, I turn to the internet. The answers are there. However, despite how long it has been around, I am still caught off guard by the people who don't grasp the power of the tool that is so easily available to them.

I am done learning new things until someone can prove to me that we won't have Google forever.
— Brett Minor (@brettminor) December 2, 2012

I can't tell you how many times I have been teaching, when a student, who is sitting at a computer logged into the internet, will ask me something like,

"What's the capitol of North Dakota?"
"Who was the 23rd president?"
"How many species of roaches are there?"
"Where is the coccyx?"

These are supposed to be kids of the Internet Generation. The entire world of knowledge is at their fingertips right in front of them and it doesn't occur to them to use it. However, if you ask them to show you the latest rap video or their favorite porn site, they'll type so fast their fingers blur.

Anything you could possibly want to know (and stuff you don't want to know) is out there, but you have to know how to find it. There are all sorts of crazy tricks to find what you are looking for, but the easiest place to start (and usually as far as you need to go) is .   Just about anything you could possibly be looking for will be available through this site.

Just tried to switch to Bing. Google was like, "You can, but it'd be a real shame if some of your old searches got out."
— Brett Minor (@brettminor) September 19, 2012

In fact, Google is so useful, it will anticipate what you are looking for before you even get it all typed in. I started to enter some searches to illustrate.

After only five letters, Google knew what I was looking for and offered suggestions. After this search you can correct someone when they incorrectly use the word allopolyploidy when they should have said autopolyploidy. Those words are not interchangeable.

Google is also careful to help you understand why things are they way they are, as illustrated by this search.

Well, which is it?

Whichever opinion you may hold, Google will find you the information you need to support it. Google will even find things you didn't know that you wanted to know about. Look what happened when I started searching for myself (Brett Minor).

It's spooky how much Google knows. When I said you can find anything, I meant it. Despite how thorough Google appears to be just by looking at these illustrations, it does something even cooler. You can search by image. I used the picture to the right to see if it was floating around out there on the internet anywhere. It's a picture of me from my childhood that was just being uploaded for the first time, so there shouldn't be any results. To my surprise, Google found something immediately and I was met with the following screen.

I was intrigued as to why my picture might appear on a website about Kenya. Maybe I had a doppelganger there. So, I clicked the links and they both had the same picture.

Why Google thinks that a baby picture of me looks like the Kenyan flag is beyond me, but Google is much smarter than me or anybody, so we have to trust it. Although, I really don't see it.

Can you see the resemblance?

I just don't see it, but I dug deeper into the site Google suggested to see if I was missing something. After a few minutes, I discovered that Kenya is planning to modify its flag in order to make it more personal. Here is a picture of one of the suggested patterns.

So, Google was right after all. I should have known better than to doubt. This should be proof to everyone that whatever you may be looking for, Google has the answer. If you are wondering how far it is to the nearest Clown parade, how many people live in the Vatican, the ingredients in vegetarian haggis, or how to build a carburetor for a flying toilet, then Google is the place to look first.

If you can't find it with Google, then you probably don't need to know it anyway.

Google, I don't need you to tell me how quickly (.15 seconds) you found the results. Relax. You got the job.
— Brett Minor (@brettminor) May 27, 2012

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Happily participating in the Blogging from A to Z Challenge. For the entire month of April, 1,897 bloggers are still working their way through the alphabet. One letter every day but Sundays for a total of 26 days.

Click here to visit the website and get more information to see if you might want to join in next year. It's a lot of fun, introduces you to hundreds of new blogs and gives your writing some fantastic exposure.