Monday, March 18, 2013

Funny Bone Results #19


I hope you had a wonderful day of doing whatever it is that people do on St. Patrick's Day. Seriously, other than wearing green and getting really drunk, I don't know what the holiday is all about.

Despite my ignorance, people are living it up today in the name of an Englishman who, after suffering years of slavery in Ireland, escaped only to willingly go back years later to preach Christianity to his captors.
While people are drinking green beer today, at one time, people could legally use much more potent stuff. This was the subject of last week's Funny Bone post. I supplied the following picture and asked my readers to come up with a slogan for this product.

Try our new improved daytime formula. Now with COCAINE.
Here are the slogans I received:

Addman of Muppets for Justice - Guaranteed for a good nights sleep. Side effects may include vivid dreams, hallucinations, and days spent pretending to be an orange hummingbird.

Shane Morgan of In Shane's Brain - "One Night" helping your inner-rapist since 1875.

Brandie Boddie of Penning Praises - Dreams guaranteed. Whether they're sweet is another story.

A Beer for the Shower Contains less than 1% alcohol, so you know it's good for you!

Sandee of Comedy Plus - When the war on drugs just wasn't an issue.

Neal Call of Raised By My Daughter - Side effects: The munchies. Inebriation. Waking up under random bridges or in seedy Chinese opium dens without any clothes and painted blue.

Amanda of The Southern Unbelle
  • One Night- In case 1 hour isn't enough to finish them off
  • One Night- Endorsed by both Jack the Ripper and Florence Nightingale  
Red of Doesn't Speak Klingon
  • Whoa! The formula for Pamprin!
  • This will keep your woman sane during "that time of the month". Guaranteed.
Manzanita of Wanna Buy a Duck -  One Night....One Knight


  1. I don't quite get St. Patrick's day, either. I imagine that we've completely bastardized it here in the States, though.

    I love how that bottle says, 'skillfully combined with other ingredients.' If the those are the ingredients they listed, imagine what other things they poured into that bottle!

    1. I don't have anything against it, but I have no idea how it turned into what it is today.

  2. I kind of like Red's response. I bet that stuff would have worked fantastic on PMS.

    1. We should do some experiments. Maybe they should bring it back.

  3. I didn't wear green yesterday and I didn't have a beer either. I guess it was just another day to me. Yep, that's it exactly.

    Have a terrific day. :)

    1. I was at work most the day, but they did serve corned beef and cabbage.


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