Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Fortune Cookie #2

Last week, Adam and I got to eat at my favorite restaurant in Mt. Vernon China Buffet #6. The last time I was here there was some confusion about why it was called #6. Of the few employees that spoke English, none of them knew the reason. On this visit, I got my answer.

The owner opened 5 other restaurants before he opened this one.

I know. Boring. I was hoping it was something more interesting, like:
  • It was the sixth attempt at passing health code regulations and this was the first one to succeed.
  • The owner kept opening restaurants to give to his homely daughters that would never find husbands and this was for daughter number six.
  • The previous five restaurants had been destroyed by ninjas to avenge the theft of a General Tsao chicken recipe.
  • Six Buddhist monks are sworn to protect against the Mongols now that the restaurant has installed a Mongolian barbecue. The descendants of Genghis Khan are not happy.
Adam convinced her to pose for a picture.
I don't think she ever really understood
what he wanted.
We were served by our favorite waitress. I don't know her name, because I am given a different answer every time I ask her. I don't think she speaks English. She understands it well enough to take our order, but even then it is very limited. Luckily, it's a buffet place and she really only needs to know what you want to drink.

Waitress: What to drink?
Adam: Mountain Dew.
Waitress (to me): You?
Me: What do you have?
Waitress: You want soda?
Me: I quit drinking soda. What do you have?
Waitress: Sorry. Say again?
Me: What do you have?
Waitress: Drink. You want what?
Me: Do you have a menu?
Waitress: Mountain Dew
Me: No, no. Menu
Waitress: OK (walks away)

On her return she brings Adam's his Mountain Dew and I get a Pepsi. It may not have been what I ordered, but I guarantee she will never let it go empty. She keeps it full. She is a very good waitress, even if she does not speak the language of her customers.

The end of the meal comes and we receive our fortune cookies. I pull mine out and it says:


That's great. Everyone wants good luck and the Chinese are telling me that it is going to happen. They are also saying that it is going to happen soon. In the spring. The first day of spring was less than 6 weeks ago. The middle of June will see the end of spring, so my good luck is about to happen quickly.

Am I going to win the lottery? Probably not, since I don't play the lottery. Is a rich relative going to die and leave me their fortune. No, none of my family has any real money. Is my blog going to explode with growth, get a million new followers, be discovered by a world renowned literary agent and I get buckets of cash thrown at me? It could happen.

I carried this fortune in my wallet to keep it in mind and not take any little blessings for granted. Here is what has happened since I received this fortune.
  • I ended up in the emergency room for my shoulder pain again. BAD LUCK. However, this visit led to a discovery of the issue causing these pains. I have started treatment to prevent further injury. GOOD LUCK.
  • Reaching the end of the semester in graduate school, I have a 4.0 average. GOOD LUCK...and hard work on my part. I am only giving luck so much credit.
  • This week I was offered a position as office manager of a new business opening in town this summer. I accepted the job. GOOD LUCK.
  • Regular followers of my blog know that I have been talking to Red for the last few months. A few days ago, she moved. This move brought her 750 miles closer than she was before. GOOD LUCK.
Since all these things happened in the spring, I will consider this fortune to be accurate. Of course, the spring is not over. I even spoke to Red's father briefly on the phone yesterday and he did not threaten me with any type of physical violence.

It has been a good spring and I anticipate it to be followed up by a great summer. Part of the great summer will involve more trips to the China Buffet #6...maybe I can bring Red there sometime. 

43 comments:

  1. I'll be rooting for the mega blog-explosion. But how cool about your job! And I hope your arm gets taken care of. I too have a thorn in my flesh. It's not easy living with pain!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I pray they will find the cause of your pain as well and it can get taken care of.

      Thanks for the cheers.

      Delete
  2. Congratulations on the job and the 4.0!! No easy feat. Very patriotic, very Rocky IV.

    That's wonderful and I hope more greatness is in store for you.

    Maybe, someday...

    You'll even get the drink you wanted.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Get the drink he wanted? Let's come back to reality Pish :p

      Spring is looking awesome for you mate, keep us informed

      Delete
    2. Thank you to both of you. I have sweat blood for the 4.0. I felt like bragging a little bit.

      The next year is looking pretty good. I am ready to tackle it.

      Delete
  3. If you're really lucky, maybe the awards fairy will drop by again. lol

    Congrats on all the good luck though. I hope you'll remember your readers when your blog explodes and you're super famous and rich. haha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am hoping to never see the awards fairy again.

      Thank you. If I do get super rich, I will spend some of my money traveling around meeting all my blog followers.

      Delete
    2. Chicago is nice in Spring. Late Spring, that is. Like almost summer.

      Delete
    3. I like Chicago. I would be up for that.

      Delete
  4. I read a post just yesterday (I can't remember the name of the blog, and I feel just awful about that)about a woman whose fortune read: Maybe next time you will live on the moon.

    This is why I don't eat Chinese Food. They give you that damn cookie, and you have to, you have to, you just have to crack it open. In your case, you should be happy you got a blessing from the cookie.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree. It's a silly little tradition, but I still have to read it. I was with a group one time and one of the women's fortune said, "You are pretty."

      It made her day.

      Delete
    2. The blog was "Red Means Go"--I read it too.

      We have similar buffet waitresses here. If you don't order hot tea, who knows what you'll get. It's all part of the fun!

      Delete
    3. It's like spinning a roulette wheel. We should place bets on what will come to the table to add to the excitement.

      Delete
  5. Brett do they have coconut buns at your Chinese House? They are my all time bestest thing. And i wiill tell you this right now, when my time on earth is through & I am eventually embalmed, I am requesting the funeral home to stuff me full with coconut buns. No orifice is out of bounds. They were invented by God himself I'm sure.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They do have those. I am not a fan of any of the Chinese desserts, so I don't care for them, but I would be more than happy to ensure that you are stuffed with them upon death.

      Kind of creepy, but I'll make it happen.

      Delete
  6. All those things are good news. I too wish for blog super-stardom. Sigh! Maybe I need to start eating more Chinese food. Congrats on the job & the 4.0. I'm working my way back up to that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. Maybe we should kidnap The Bloggess Jenny Lawson. That would get some attention. Then, we could use the fame we gain from her writing about it to launch our own careers when we get out of prison.

      Delete
  7. How funny! I got a good fortune cookie about and "important journey" leading to "new adventures" the last time Aphrodite and I had Chinese before I left.

    ...that explains why Dad was smiling when he handed me the phone. It wasn't anything you had said to make him laugh, it was the Chinese fortune. Good to know.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I did introduce myself as the guy that has been chasing your daughter.

      I recently got "Let the spirit of adventure set the tone."

      That one may be another blog post.

      Delete
    2. just a thought, if you show up at Reds dad's house and there is a giant, man sized basket attached to lagre rubber bands, don't go anywhere near that thing!

      Chinese buffet is your enemy.....tastey as all get out, but nothing good for your waiste line ever comes from buffet. Unless you have super will power greater than i do?

      Delete
    3. I don't eat as much as I used to. One plate and I am generally done. It's not a willpower thing. I just don't have the appetite I used to. However, I could easily eat every hour if I don't keep myself in check.

      Delete
    4. "spirit of adventure" indeed.

      Delete
  8. I adore all of the waitresses at our local Dragon Buffet, although none of them can tell me why they don't serve dragon.

    I'm hoping the rest of your luck in spring is of the GREAT kind. It seems you're on an upswing, and nothing can stop you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Things are looking good so far. I pray they continue that way.

      Delete
  9. I actually always throw away the fortune cookies. I don't eat them and rarely do I ever think about opening them to just read them (besides, if you don't take a bite, the fortune won't come true, or so I'm told). Maybe I need to start investigating. Maybe I'm trashing all my good fortune. Then again, the last time I ordered Chinese food was many months ago, so I'm probably ok.

    Good luck today. I'm hoping for sparks! :) Tell Red I said, "Hey, hon." She'll understand. Local dialect and all.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I never considered that. I never eat the cookies, I just rip their guts out and read the papers.

      As for the rest, stay tuned. It's a secret.

      Delete
  10. Oh the poor thing! She looks absolutely petrified in that picture. Hee hee.

    Never had a fortune cookie, they're not as big a deal over here, like they are in the US.
    I would love to know what the future brings, even if it's by way of edible food.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She really didn't want to get close enough to have the picture taken.

      Fortune cookies really aren't that exciting. It's just a fun little game. My daughter likes to add the phrase "on the toilet" to any fortune cookie.

      "Let the spirit of adventure set the tone.
      On the toilet....followed by juvenile laughter

      Delete
  11. I love Chinese food. I'm laughing at your creative ideas for why the restaurant is called #6.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. I thought they would be much more exciting.

      Delete
  12. Its my fault I drag him to lunch a couple of times a week...bad thing is I dont remember mine....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Every time Adam asks where I want to go for lunch, my answer is the same

      "#6!"

      Delete
  13. You know, if any of those were the actual reason behind the name I don't think they'd tell you.

    In other words, don't ask, find out yourself. They're probably hiding the real reason.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're probably right. I had never considered that. I know I saw a ghost in the kitchen one time, but I wrote it off as an ancient Chinese secret. I need to do a little digging.

      Delete
  14. I think fortune cookie fortunes should be realistic--a mix of bad fortunes to make the good ones more plausible, or odd compliments. Something like "nice boobs" could go both ways. Positive if you're a girl, and really negative if you're a guy...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That would probably cause an increase in sales as well.

      Delete
  15. I have a friend in Jerusalem who names his restaurants in the same way - but I think he's in the teens by now.

    So exciting that you talked to Red's dad! Sounds like he no longer thinks of you as "strange men that Red is meeting online"... nice... I'm all dewy eyed! Fortune cookies are a good thing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Somehow I missed responding to this comment five months ago. At this point, I have met Red's father several times. I try to behave myself around the parents. I don't know if he thinks I am a strange man or not.

      Delete
  16. Wait, so you got this fortune cookie after a lot of the good luck happened? So it's like retroactively taking credit for your good luck? Hmmmm.

    Glad to hear the chat with Red's dad went well!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I got the cookie last week, so most of it happened after I got it. Although, Red hadn't moved yet, the plans were already underway before the cookie. And I had worked hard all semester for that grade, but I thought his was a good time to brag on myself a little.

      Delete
  17. I've always thought Chinese fortunes should be more like "You will walk out of this restaurant when you are done eating." That one will always come true, unless...well, you know, something really bad happened. I'm glad your fortune came true! :) (Thanks for linking up with us over at #findingthefunny this week!)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are welcome. Thank you for stopping over to read.

      Delete

Getting comments on my blog is like finding a McNugget in my fries. It just doesn't get any better. Leave a comment while you're here.