Having a lack of confidence.
Now, to be honest, I have always been filled with self-doubt but I faked confidence because I've always believed it made people take me more seriously. Unfortunately, I often went overboard.
Not to sound arrogant, but I'm pretty confident that I'm the hottest man living in this house.— GigaBrett (@brettminor) July 22, 2019
As the years went on, I learned to dial it back a bit and come off as less of an arrogant jerk.
I used to think I was the smartest person in the world. Now…well, I still think that. I've just learned to not be so vocal about it.— GigaBrett (@brettminor) May 28, 2019
I think the youthful arrogance has gone by the wayside for the most part and now I just quietly live my life, but occasionally I feel my pride starting to swell. The past month has been good for my ego. Or bad - depending on how you look at it.
About a month ago, the mother of one of my online students asked me to quit my job and become her son's personal tutor. She offered me an ungodly amount of money for my wife and me to move to Beijing so I could work exclusively with her son for the remainder of his school career. (He just turned 6 two weeks ago.) She would cover all moving expenses and living expenses and then pay me a very impressive salary. It took some work to convince her that I would never move back to China, but the offer really made me take some pride in my work. I can honestly say that I am good at what I do.
Since then, my wife and I have been asked by a couple of different parents to come to visit them when Vietnam allows travel again. I have been invited to Harbin and Tokyo and Red has been invited to Hong Kong.
Last week, our landlords from our previous house contacted us begging us to come back. They even lowered the rent about 35% from what they were asking when we moved out a year ago. They really enjoyed us as tenants and are sad they created a situation (significant bump in rent) that caused us to leave. Good tenants are difficult to find. Plus, now with COVID, things are even more difficult. It is nice to be wanted.
Finally, just a few days ago, our current landlords commissioned me to be their grandson's ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher when he turns two. He is currently six months old. Once again, it is nice to be wanted. And it really feels good to be recognized for doing something well.
In the midst of all the misery and difficulties happening in the world right now, it is important to sometimes stop and consider the things that have been going right. We've had our setbacks like everyone else, but a quick consideration of the good things as well is good for everyone. We still have plenty to be thankful for.
Now, I just have to get past one of the things I have been accused of many times.
LAZINESS
Why do people keep wanting me to do stuff? It's like they don't even now me.— GigaBrett (@brettminor) May 29, 2019
Also beaches, good food, being able to help people, puppies, geography...
ReplyDeleteAll good stuff.
DeleteSo, um, you're a man... There's something in the male psyche that seems to make you all have big heads. At least, that's how it seems from the female perspective. But you're right, those are things to be proud of. It's nice to be wanted, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteIt is. We were sitting a reflected last week about what the good things were in the midst of all this chaos and these things occurred to me. They had almost slipped by without notice.
Delete