Monday, January 3, 2011

Everything is Bigger in Texas (and Your Thirties)

Christmas is over and all that wonderfully fattening food that everyone stuffs down their throats for six weeks has been hidden away and now it is time to get that weight back off.  People are more than aware of the extra weight that gets put on during the holidays and only a very few are disciplined enough to not succumb to the crazed, borderline diabetes-flirting tendencies that go hand in hand with celebrating the birth of the Savior of the world.  I have overheard scores of conversations at work about the weight that now has to be worked off.  This is definitely the busiest time of year for the entire weight-loss industry.  There is no shortage of ways you can lose weight and there are plenty of supposedly “fun” ways to do it.  Past and current video examples include: Sweatin’ to the Oldies, Hip-Hop Cardio, Stripper Aerobics, Belly Dance Fitness, Cardio Salsa, Official Dirty Dancing Workout and many others.

Myself, like many others, have gained a few (dozen?) pounds over these festive holidays.  However, I may have started a bit earlier.  I noticed a few months ago how tight my jeans were starting to get.  I just haven’t taken any action yet.  However, that changed last night when Facebook informed me I had been tagged in a photo.

Waltonville High School Prom - 1988

This photo was taken in May of 1988 before the four of us went to the Waltonville Prom.  The couple on the right is Jeff Caudle and Stephanie (Allison) Maines.  Jeff was my best friend and dated Stephanie for a couple of years in high school.  Susan Wagner is the girl in pink who agreed to accompany me to the prom.  I still don’t know why she agreed, but was happy she did.  The dork on the left is me, still in shock that a pretty girl would agree to be seen with me.  Jennifer Ann Kabat is not in this picture.  There is no reason to expect that she would be, but she wanted to be mentioned in my next blog.

I have Stephanie to thank for this photo.  Apparently, it was uploaded about 18 months ago, but I never saw it until she tagged me in it last night prompting Facebook to inform me of its presence.  After the fleeting moment of nostalgia these old pictures often create, I began to be increasingly aware of my present physical state.  The Brett in that picture was so thin and his hair was so big.  I really don’t miss the big hair, but I do miss the smaller waistline.

When I graduated high school I weighed 155 pounds.  Ten years later, I was very proud of the fact that I still weighed the same.  However, I had no reason to be proud.  I had not really accomplished anything.  I was just lucky to have good genes and a high metabolism.  I had always been thin.  I ate anything and everything that came in front of me.  My mother tells the story of me eating a dead grasshopper out of a windowsill as a small child.  That may be disgusting but it just shows that I have always loved to eat.  My great-grandmother used to marvel at how much of her homemade gravy I could eat.  After every Sunday meal, once we ran out of food, I would just spoon the gravy over bread and keep eating until it was gone.  Needless to say, I have never had healthy eating habits, but it didn’t seem to matter since it had no effect on me.  But one day, it changed.

About the time I turned 30 I was buying some new jeans.  I didn’t buy jeans very often because I always had to go out of town to find my size.  I had very long legs and a small waist size.  That combination is not usually found in Wal-Mart.  Because different brands of jeans have different cuts, it is necessary to try on all pairs before buying.  In the dressing room I was quite frustrated to find that I could not button any of the jeans in my size. The store clerk had the nerve to suggest that maybe I should try a different size.  Why would I do that?  Who wants to wear clothes that aren’t in their size?   I do not know how long this new expansion had been going on, but that was the first time I noticed it.  My weight has fluctuated up and down a bit since then, but I have never gotten back down to that size again.

My past experiences with intentional weight control have been fairly painless.  A few small adjustments to my diet and a little extra physical activity causes the pounds to just fall off.  However, I have to intentionally pursue this.  I lose the weight, but then stop paying attention and find myself back to gasping for breath every time I climb the stairs to my apartment.  Generally, by the time I notice I need to diet I am bigger than I was the last time I needed to.

So, I am at that point again and need to do something.  Unfortunately, it is the middle of winter and too cold to venture outside for extended periods of time without losing body parts, although, that would take off pounds rather quickly.  Whether I wait until spring or tackle this now remains to be seen, but I will get to it.  Lately, I have been too distracted by these new patches of hair I didn’t used to have.


  1. Thank you old neighbor!!!! Loved it! And....the hair thing...I have a hair that grows out of my chin that I call "My Goat Hair" is not here one day then the next it feels like 5 inches I pluck it...forget about it happens all over again! Grrrrrr!!!!!!!!!! Btw...according to Wii Fitness I am at the correct weight for my age and height....but my Wii age is 52! Hahahahaha :)

  2. I am so very happy that the nostalgic picture prompted a post. Like Jennifer Kabat, I really do like reading your blog and happy to see that I got I was happy to say that my wii-fit age is *gasp* 40, which is creeping right up on me (1 year-2days!). But, I firmly believe that it is closer to 57, I just have really good balance. Anyway, I will be looking forward to further posts! Happy New Year!

  3. As always, you entertain me, Brett! I tried to do better this holiday and it worked until my mom made fudge and sent it home with me. Witch. :)

  4. Very funny again Brett. I will have to let Ed know about the hair. He has several patches on his back that migrate. Haven't quite figured out the migratory path or seasons yet, but maybe that should be the topic of my blog? LOL

  5. I have grown to a wise enough age to know to keep my mouth shut when i comes to people complaining about how much they weight. I have found, not everyone has the opertunity to do an extensive workout for their job every day iether.


Leave a comment. C'MON!!! You're already here. Leave a comment. Don't leave me hanging and wondering if any has ever seen these words. I'll rub your feet.